I don’t understand what happens, and how this happens, but as soon as the holiday season kicks in, I start losing myself to negativity and uncertainty. I start losing all the hope and faith inside of me, and give in to the terrible anxiety and fear. These times are really trying, and however much I try it is extremely difficult to come out of it easily.
As always my consolation comes from books, being the recluse that I am. But somehow, whatever I am getting hold of recently seems to be depressing, either there is someone who dies, or something that keeps the protagonist in constant misery, there is only pain and suffering in what I am reading too.
So, basically I need book suggestions that do not include any kind of heartache. Please, I am really clinging onto you guys now, I need to revive my faith and get back on the right track.
I want to start my new year with something that brings smile to my face, and not with something that leaves me dejected and wondering.
Anything, please…. (You must know I am desperate, if only to read something good.)
There is no ‘Your God’ or ‘My God’
All godliness comes from the same source, just the manifestations are different.
It is these thoughts that sometimes bring so much of positivity within me, so much of strength and courage, a sense of being.
Om Namah Shivay;
I hate hose people who do not accept other’s views.
It’s okay if you want to be pessimistic, if you are of the belief that thinking negative all the while, makes you overjoyed when something good happens all of a sudden. It is okay. That is your way of living life; your beliefs, and I do not interfere with you. Okay, I do try and pull you out of that pessimistic zone, giving may be a lift to your mood, or a little positive thought, but I don’t just disagree with you. Do I?
Then why would you not just give my way of life a chance? I am not saying you follow them, may be just accept that I have a different way of thinking things.
Okay, even if you don’t want to do that, then in the least possible means, at least keep shut.
What gives you the right to take away my beliefs from me, my faith with such mean words?
I am sorry this may not a good post for reading but this is the least thing possible that my mind can rack through today.
I thought I loved you enough for the sake of two but as it proves I might have been wrong then. It never worked out and it might have been for good, you seem happy now and that is all I ever wanted. And yet somewhere deep down there was always a part of me throughout that pined for some way, some microscopic possibility that I could get the love, the feeling that I wanted, wanted from you.
You seem to be blissful but never did it occur to you that somewhere someone might have been hurt and you never knew that you were the reason. It did hurt when you wouldn’t talk to me, when you would ignore me and yet all I thought about was how to make you smile. It hurt when despite this I could just not let you out of my thoughts.
I had faith in you then, I have faith in you now.
I have cried and have laughed, had tears of happiness and of torment and yet the only thing that brings me here is that someday someone will come and make me realise that why it never worked with you. Why it was always hollow and partial and then I would know what I had been missing on.
PS: What is a love story without a heart break, right? 😉
Pic: As always googled!
“I have faith in God!
I have faith in my guardian angel who brought me here and who stays here with me.”
I do not remember where I read this but this has stayed with me stuck on a post it, above my study for a few years now. And when I am down this sure pulls me up. It’s difficult to always have that faith but once I try and believe in it I just leave everything on I don’t know, destiny?
Turning the pages of the newspapers I only see advertisements of the ‘Puja sale’ ‘Diwali sale’ or some other kind of sale going in the shops and online websites, it is then when somehow this irony struck on me. On page 4 I read an article named, “Minor girl kidnapped by classmate, raped for three days.” While just on the next page there was an advertisement for ‘Durga pooja’ saying, “Instead of searching for her in an idol, find her in your life.”
We human beings are so cryptic, we pray to an idol with all our heart while a girl is faced with such inhuman conduct, goes through such humiliation that she herself is reduced to such a state of a cold heartedness.