Tag Archives: heart

A Supplementary Question Paper!

When life is already disarraying, my fate really plays good with me, it adds on to the miseries and dilemma. As if, I already wasn’t dealing with enough questions, I have a supplementary sheet to answer, which accordingly is not optional!!

I wouldn’t say the questions are really difficult, they are simple questions, pertaining to the syllabus; life!! And yet here I am struggling to merely swim above the level, simply trying to breathe.

I wouldn’t say these are really miseries, and if I were to mention them as agonies, they are the sweet ones. The only trouble is I don’t know how to deal with them. The lack of experience, knowledge, you could say anything pertaining to the curriculum, which leads me to jitter at the possible thought of simply sitting with the question paper.

So, what do I do?

My heart has a very simple answer!

But the practical me always wins!! It has reasons and explanation, a supplementary brief study for almost every Multiple Choice Questions too! It has a basic tendency to analyse and criticise, take future and past into hand.

Again, I ask, what do I do?

I am pretty sure, this is going to sound more of a rambling post, rather than a scream for help.

So, I really don’t know what to do. As I already mentioned, the questions aren’t demanding, only, the answers are a little more convoluted.



I have been off lately, from blogging, from WordPress for which I don’t even have a specific reason.

It all started a while ago when I started drifting off from everything, even the things which gave me pleasure, started boring me. I don’t know how it started, but somehow it all led to me being a complete static person. I wouldn’t say I was too busy working, or studying, I was simply occupied with my day to day work, from which I could take time out for everything, even blogging.



I wouldn’t say I was away from work too, no, that didn’t happen. Everything kept going on as it should, but only without interest and my heart in it. Life moved on, but I wasn’t truly happy with what was  happening.

My friends and family of course thinks all is well because by now I have mastered the art of deceiving my feelings in front of them. My social life too seemed pretty active which these days, make people believe that the person is all right!

So when I logged into WordPress to find so many people concerned about my absence, I was truly touched. I wouldn’t say I am good now, the process of recovery is still going on. But I am way better than I was a few days ago.

What happened? I don’t know!

I just lost the motivation to do anything in particular. I have been simply sulking, having lost the vigor to do anything. This anything comprises from blogging to studying to even talking to people.

I hope to get out of this mood soon enough. I hope to find my path soon.

But before that I truly thank you all for even considering my absence in your thoughts.


What Do You Do?

What do you do when something occupies too much of your time, too much of the space in your already overthinking mind?

What do you do when things that happen are absolutely out of your control?

What do you do when there are only negative thoughts, and more destructive thoughts making home in your heart and mind?

Needless to say the first suggestion would be to talk things out, to share your woes and doubts with people who care about you.

You pray and hope, and calm your mind but those little evil people are trapped within you.

Then comes the idea of writing your feelings down, word by word. Writers often tend to this technique to cure the ache.

But you see, when desperation kicks in, you go as far as writing your frame of mind and even burning the sheet down to mere ashes; repeatedly!

What do you do when despite all the efforts, those thoughts and feelings stick with you?

What do you do when your thoughts are absolutely out of control? When those thoughts, pains you like a piercing needle, slowly seeping blood out?

What do you do when you can take no more?

What do you do when nothing helps, and even the thoughts (the fact that it is not happening in reality, it is only a thought and a feeling in my head is significant here) shatter you to the core?

What do you when you can’t face the consequences of those thoughts?


More Yours, Than Mine.


I smile a little more these days

As, the smiles on my face

Are a little more yours, than mine.


I cry a little more these days.

As, the tears in eyes,

Are a little more yours, than mine.


I hate a little more these days,

As, even the hatred in my mind

Is a little more yours, than mine.


I get tempered a little more these days,

As, the fuming rage in my voice

Is a little more yours, than mine.


I love a little more these days,

As, the love that blossoms in my soul

Is a little more yours, than mine.


I laugh a lot these days,

As, the laughter in my heart

Is a little more yours, than mine.


I am yours, and you are mine,

And together we colour,

Each other’s beautiful, lives.

A Word is All I Need

I read something yesterday, and I loved it so much that honestly I will not be satisfied unless I share it, post it almost everywhere.

So here it goes-

Touch me with words where your hands can’t reach.

-M. Razon

Reality Check

Mind: what are you doing? Are you of your senses? I think I am working pretty well for you to behave like this.

Heart: why what have I done? I am just talking to him.

M: yes, but you know, what is going to happen.

H: no, I don’t know and neither do you.

M: no dear I think I am smarter than you. I know how this is going to end.

H: stop being pessimistic.

M: I am just being rationalistic. He is going to talk to you for a few days and then just suddenly he will be out of your sight and you will be shattered, once again, disappointed in yourself for trusting someone and depending on someone, emotionally yet again.

H: why, couldn’t it be otherwise?

M: I think you have seen enough to realise that by now. My friend I am not your enemy. This is just a reality check for you. Stop it here. Or else the consequences are not beautiful. He cannot be trusted and you have been broken enough, it could be you last survival hit. Do not trust on your intuitions again, they have never been helpful. Just believe that not everyone is made for that kind of love, or friendship if that is what you are trying to say next. Please, I can’t see you being broken again, the healing is process is long enough and it also terminates a lot of my works. And, all of this just for one person? Why do you want to trust again, open up again, confide in someone else yet again only to be wrecked once again? Why?

H: But why not?

PS: Since love is in the air, a little something of my mind and heart’s confusions I have almost for every other person. Hope it’s worth your time. If nothing else just humour yourself.